Sarah is STRESSED!!!!

And where do you come in to this, you might ask? Well, here's how:

Sarah's exams start in two weeks time. These are more important exams than your GCSEs, or AS levels, or even A levels. These are, in fact, the exams that determine whether or not Sarah stays at Oxford, and she failed them last year. This, naturally, makes Sarah even more stressed about these exams, and that is where you come in. For the next two weeks, Sarah would very much appreciate it if you texted her with encouraging comments, or jokes, or odes to how wonderful she is. Anything really that will help her feel less stressed. In return, if she passes (thanks to all your help), Sarah promises to throw the BEST PARTY EVER (probably consisting of another Blog-B-Q) and will invite everyone who helped! If you don't have Sarah's mobile number, you can either get it of Richard (Stewart and Lewis) or Sarah HB, or Sophie, anyone who seems likely to have it really, or send her an e-mail, that will also be acceptable. Let the supportiveness commence!

Sarah

p.s. Please help! Otherwise Sarah will cry, and you wouldn't want that now, would you?

I've been feeling I ought to post for a while, and here is the perfect opportunity! So move up people, I'm hopping on the wagon.

First the photo:














It's me doing an oh so amusing walk down invisible stairs. It's over a year old, I have, like, no recent photos of me! I don't know what's happened!

Name: Sarah Jane Browncross
Age: 20
Height: mmm, 5 foot 4 I think. It's about average for a girl
Weight: I don't know, I've put on loads of weight recently, so about 9 and a half stone probably. My jeans don't fit anymore. *looks sad*
Hair colour: It's never quite recovered from when I dyed it Chocolate Brown...
Hair Style: Long and untidy, I'm going to get it cut soon.
Eye Colour: Hazel
Blood type: B positive. I think it's appropriate. And also, why do none of you guys give blood? You can't all be having sex with a man who has engaged in anal sex with another man, surely?
Status: Single, and also Alpha female.
Build: Not so skinny anymore... Damn half stone! Damn fattening pasta!
Siblings: Two sisters
Pets: Leo-Oliver, Sylvia-Lenin, Joseph-Galileo, all the guppies, and also the new baby frogs.
Pro-life or pro-choice: My opinions have changed as I have aged. Pro-life.
Right or left: Left wing all the way baby!
Favourite food: Cheese! (although I'm not supposed to eat it anymore)
Favourite beverage: Orange Juice (although I'm not supposed to drink that either. Damn nutritionist!)
Chosen degree subject: Physics
Chosen Unis: Oxford. I don't really get much of a choice anymore.
Personality: Well, I asked Richard for help on this. I think I'm just going to copy the conversation.

Sarah says:
describe my personality
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
sexilicious
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
seductive volatile
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
botyliscious
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
gorgeous
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
funny
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
amazgin
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
erm
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
foring
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
with a k
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
erm
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
i dunnno
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
you think i wanted you for your personality?
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
ok
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
you are
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
funn
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
ynice
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
kind
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
lok out for others
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
supportive
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
erm
Bobby the Dark {Coffee and Catch-22. Arthouse all the way, imbeciles!} says:
awas there for people

A round of applause for Richard folks!

What I like about girls: They're so much pleasanter than boys, they smell nicer, and they don't make stupid jokes when you're trying to have important conversations with them. And they totally understand what you're talking about even if you're not making much sense.
What I like about boys: Um... I suppose they can be quite funny at times, and they're good for cuddles.
Music tastes: Stuff with a tune. Also, against my better judgement, I'm getting a little into metal.
Film tastes: Nice ones. I no longer watch emotionally challenging ones. I have real life for that.
TV shows: I have no TV. And nothing will ever compare to The Farmer Wants a Wife.
Hobbies: Dungeons and Dragons! I've just started a game up here! It's so cool! I'm the Dungeon Master! I'll do a post soon and show you all the monsters I've made! And also singing.
Nationality: English
Heritage: I come from a long and proud line of illegitimate Bristolians.
Favourite colour: I like them all. What's a few nanometres between friends?
Favourite metal: Nightwish
Favourite non-metal:
Dislikes: Oxford NHS
Pet type: Cats, fish, frogs, gerbils, anything that won't die on us really. And tortoises! I really want a tortoise! Please can someone get me a tortoise? I've thought up a name and everything! It's really good!
Pet age: I think Leo-Oliver is about 6. We're not terribly good at record keeping.
House: Semi-detached
Parents still married?: Not at all.
Intelligence: Pretty good, but I'm also modest.
Gender: Female
Sexual orientation: Straight.
Homophobe?: Not at all, my last boyfriend was totally gay.
Anything else-phobe: Water. *shudders*
Been on a boat?: Yes
A plane: Yes
A hovercraft: No
Town of residence: Oxfard! and also Dulwich!
Any crushes?: There's no-one good here.
Best mate?: SOPHIE!!! and also my entourage of boys.
Am I mad? Not at all.
Lonely?: I miss all you London folk.
Feeling towards exams?: So much better than last year.
Do I like you? I like everybody!
Distinguishing features: Aura of radiance.
Any skills?: I'm pretty good at fixing things. And also at finding triple scalar products.
What would you do if in command of all?: Make everyone half Betazoid
Thoughts of future: To finally make it into the second year.
What's that?: A stupid question.
Cock size: Well, obviously I don't have one, but I do have information I could reveal... For a small fee of course...
Favourite sport: Punting
Favourite real animal: Specific puppies
Favourite mythical creature: All my monster! I love them!
Date of birth: 06/12/1985
Star sign: It's been scientifically proven to be rubbish. They had a article about it in Physics World this month. I'll show you if you like.
Chinese new year: Call me judgemental, but I'll say that this one's rubbish as well.
Happy?: Finally.
EMO!: Please. Do I really look like one?
Then what are you?: An Oxford intellectual.
Errr...: and a geek
Religious: Christian. The happy clappy sort.

Monsters post coming soon folks!